My mom says I can't just do book reviews. So here is a real post - about Sam and some of the funny things he has done and said lately.
First of all, our new favorite place to go is Payson Lakes on the Nebo Loop in the Uinta Mountains. It's far enough away that you feel like you're actually going some where, but close enough to still want to go. So there is this little lake and people of all ages come with their floatation devices of all shapes and sizes and they have fun in the sun and water. Thanks to my niece Allynn, Sam had something to float on when we went last Saturday. It was just your average floating mattress, Long, Skinny, Pillow at the top. So he's going around on it with his stomach down and his arms in the water to paddle with. He got the hang of it really fast and he was pretty quick too. He knew how to turn and get where he wanted to go pretty well within the first three minutes. I don't know why this impresses me so much. Oh yeah, it's because I have the smartest kid EVER!
Anyway, he's floating around, and there are these little punk four year olds, (not really punks, but let's just say for my story they are) who have these tube guns that suck up water when you pull and shoot the water when you push. They shoot far. So Sam , who is about 25 feet from the shore, is floating around totally relaxing when he starts to feel water landing on himself. So he slowly starts to turn. Now remember, he is laying on his stomach and he is really relaxed. Well he sees those kids with the squirting tube guns, he looks kind of interested and then they full on squirt him. Both of them . So he turns his raft thing so it's aiming right at them and then he sets his face and it is totally determined. Then he starts paddling really fast. Picture both arms moving at the same time in quick little strokes. And the raft is moving FAST. And the punks realize it. They are only about 10 feet from the shore but they know they are about to get rammed. So they turn around and start running. And the water is up to their waists so they aren't getting anywhere fast. Then the girl punk loses a shoe and she tells her brother to get it but he's not stopping. So she turns around and hesitates, seeing that Sam is totally gaining on them and then she leans out and reaches as far as she can to the shoe, not wanting to lose any ground, and then turns and starts running again. Once they reach the shore, Sam is only about 5 feet behind them and he slows and then stops and looks at them for a while like he wants to make sure they know he means business. Then he slowly turns his raft and leisurely paddles away. We all watched this from the shore and laughed our heads off.... I had no idea he had it in him. He does not usually stick up for himself, but he did us proud.
Yesterday, he and I were driving in the car and I stopped at someones house to drop something off. When I got back into the car there is a really annoying commercial on for Low Book Sales, which is a local chain of used car dealerships. They always take popular songs from the past and put their own ridiculous lyrics to the music. This was one of them. So I get in and Sam says, "Mom, this is a Low Book Sales Commercial." I said , "Oh, do you like this one?" His answer, "No, because the song said that the car scared all the women away." At that point in the commercial their theme jingle music cuts in and Sam says, "And I hate it when they say, 'Low Book Sales, a better way to buy a car!' " So then I said, "You don't like Low Book Sales?" And he said, "No, except for when we bought this baby." He is a very observant child because we did buy our car at Low Book Sales and even I didn't remember that or equate that with the commercials, I never have. And I was surprised to hear him refer to our car as "This baby" because he usually calls it Jazz. Yes, he thinks it's a transformer.
This morning Sam watched The Doodlebops, which he had not done in a long, long time, and that is fine by me because I think they are creepy. So at some point towards the beginning of each episode they recite the Doodlebop Pledge. And today is no different. Matt and I are moving around the house, each preparing to go to work, and Sam is sitting quietly on the couch watching when they start up, "We Promise to SHARE, We Promise to CARE,.... (I can't remember this part).... There's nothing to IT, We can do IT, WE can do ANYTHING!" Then we hear Sam quietly say, "Tuh, Not anything." in a totally sarcastic and jaded voice. Matt and I just looked at each other like Whaaa?????? Sam watched the whole thing and when it was over he stood up to turn the channel, (I don't know why he stood, the remote was with him on the couch) and as he was about to change it he said, " We are NOT allowed to watch that ANYMORE."
16 hours ago