Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My Silly Bandz Nightmare

Have you heard of Silly Bandz? If not, they look like this:

They come in a variety of colors and shapes. The kids like them. They wear them on their wrists. They trade them. They compare them... The kids LOVE them.
I have never purchased any of these and yet my kid has a wrist full. How he talks his friends into giving them to him without a trade, I do not know. I did witness him admiring his neighbors glow in the dark silly bandz when her mom made her give him one... Thus my nightmare.
Later that night, well after Sam had been put to bed, he strolled into our room like it was the middle of the day asking how he could charge up his glow in the dark silly band. We put it on the tissue box right under the lamp on my nightstand. I said, "I'll bring it to you in ten minutes. Don't get out of bed again." He sauntered back to his room. Ten minutes later, I made the delivery and that band, which happened to be shaped like a pair of short, of all things, was glowing good.
Fast forward to 1am. I was dead asleep when suddenly my eyes popped open. I was startled to see Sam standing less than a foot away from me.
Me: What the heck are you doing?
Sam: Charging up my silly band.
Me: The light is off.
Sam: I'm using the light from your alarm clock.
Fast forward again to 9 am. Sam has been gone for a good half hour. He roller bladed to school since his bike had it's 3rd flat tire in two weeks. I'm relaxing in my bed because my ankles are still swollen from the day before. It's been that kind of week. The phone rings, I answer and hear a tiny voice say, "Hi mom."
Me: (confused because school started one minute before and I can't imagine what could already be going wrong) Hi Sam.
Sam: I forgot my shoes.
Me: Ok, I'll bring them over.
All the way to the school I can't help thinking that had he slept through the night instead of worrying about the glow power of his silly bandz he surely would have remembered his shoes.
To start your own nightmare visit here:
Be sure to watch the featured music video.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Conversations in Costco - Episode 2

Picture us sitting at a dirty "picnic" table with giant hot dogs in a giant warehouse type store.

Me: Sam that guy behind you has a Goonies T-shirt on.
Sam: What does it say?
Me: It says, "Goonies never say die"
Sam: (In a girly voice) I'm not a Goonie.
Me: I dare you to look at him and yell , HEY YOUUUU GUUUYYYSSS!
Sam: (smiles and takes a bite of his giant hot dog)

... A few minutes pass...

Sam: Ok, I'm going to do it!
Sam turns, towards the guy, yells, "HEY YOUUU GUUYYSSS!" in his best Sloth voice. The dude wouldn't even look at him but his wife turned around really fast and gave us a dirty look. Sam and I busted up laughing.
Matt: (looking really uncomfortable) Maybe that guy doesn't feel like being teased about his shirt today.
Me: He shouldn't have worn it then, besides, we aren't teasing him, we are trying to bond with him... He doesn't deserve that shirt.
Sam and I continue to laugh...

Thursday, September 2, 2010

100 Days to Go!

As I type there is a little human going crazy inside my belly. I'm no good a deciphering the movements. I can't tell her head from her feet. But there is a lot of movin' and shakin' goin' on. Matt can feel it and see it. I'm picturing either a raging fit going on in there or a dance party. It's hard to believe that somebody who can move so much and be so strong still has 100 days to grow.
I'm nearly 26 weeks and eager to start pushing... But also enjoying these fun feelings at the same time. Feelings I have longed for for eight long years. The moving babe, the planning, the thinking about names (we have one picked out, by the way). The extra ultra sounds - my Ob's office was having trouble seeing all they were looking for, so I go to come back for another at 24 weeks and then yet another this week in the parinatology department. All is well. All fun stuff.
And then there are the not so fun feelings. The joints loosening and the joints stiffening for no apparent reason. The pinching of the sciatic nerve - random and not as bad a the end of the pregnancy with Sam. And don't get me started on the ever threatening charlie horse in my calves. Youch! They always strike in the middle of the night while I sleep. Luckily my trick of flexing my toes up, flat footed still works, but not until after I feel like something took a big bite out of my leg. My hands and ankles still swell occasionally, but my little exercises to fight off edema are still working.
The A-number-one problem, that which I worry about most, is the glow. Several people have told me now that I am glowing. A nice thing to say, but I fear, in actuality the loss of brain cells, caused by pregnancy, is showing in my new found facial expression, which is, blank, and mistaken for a glow. It's proven you know, that women who are pregnant lose brain cells. Also that their feet grow. So after this, my 8th pregnancy I am feeling really dumb, and who knows, by the end I may be wearing clown shoes to match my new brain.
I have been so forgetful. My mind wanders mid conversation. I can't articulate thoughts or ideas. Names escape me. Events go by and I don't even miss them for days. I double book myself. I repeat myself. I ask questions multiple times before the answers start to sink in. It's really annoying for someone who's mind is usually a steel trap of information. Will these cells come back? Will I have the drive and the thoughts to be the blogger I once was? Will I eat my new baby, who I have been so, so hungry for?

In other news, Matt and I celebrated our 10th anniversary by going to see The Lion King Broadway production at the Capitol Theatre in Salt Lake City. We had plans to stay at the Little America, downtown, but when we arrived they gave us a complementary upgrade to The Grand America. It was such a fun little trip. The show was fabulous, though the over abundance of children in the audience was very distracting. The hotel was beautiful, though haunted. A totally great weekend.
Sam started 4th grade last week! I can't believe it. He is more than half way through elementary school. But he's just my little boy. I have vivid memories of 4th grade. It was my best year. I moved up to the upstairs class rooms with the 5th and 6th graders. And I was so mature and totally awesome to the max. I had the most radical biker shorts with neon strips on the side and a grown out mullet. I wonder if Sam feels as grown up as I did... I kind of hope not.
Things are going well so far. He likes his teachers and he comes home happy. Something new this year, Sam has been riding his bike to and from school with a friend. They love it!